Going from one addiction to the next

Come to think of it, now that it is the holidays I don't really have much to post about.
There is no super stressful workload to complain about. No endless sleepless nights to rant on.
No awkward scenarios to reflect upon. And sadly, less social interactions with people. It's kind of sad actually... It feels worse than digital isolation. I am just going back to my old gaming addictions.

And that's the purpose of this post today. To discuss about moving from one addiction to another. Namely Gaming. While it is me simply going back to old ways, it just doesn't feel the same anymore. It somehow seems that... I've Changed? What? Really? Hmm. I guess meeting different people will have different impact on our lives. We are constantly influenced by the people we interact with and the places we go to. And apparently, despite my resistance to change, I'm no exception. Sometimes, one thing or one person can just change your entire life.

Problem is I'm not even sure. Like, the change feels like a great step in the positive direction, but then comes the fear of falling. It's like going "all-in" on something. And don't get me wrong, I really want to. But what if the hope you are holding so dearly onto, just end up failing? What if someone comes along and burst your bubble? What if in the very end, you realise it's all wishful thinking? There sure are alot of "what-if"s. BUT, what if we ignore all these fears and just blindly hold out faith and hope and move forward anyways? Will that be the best possible outcome? Will there be a happy ending in the end?




What? No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending? I sure hope not!! :s
Beautiful song from Mika, it's just a real pity the lyrics is the opposite of what I'm really hoping for.
I guess that's what could happen if it all falls apart.


Regardless, as some of you might know, I'm the kind of person who refuses to give up. So I guess my decision here would be to continue to hold on to my blind faith and continue pushing forwards. Everything I do, I will always do it for HER. Whether or not I eventually end up with that special someone. I guess I could rationalise the decision as me striving hard for myself, but I realised such egoistic thinking can only motivate you so far. Some things need that extra motivational boost to get to the next level. (From my Observer Analysis)


So what are my plans now?

Tomorrow, I shall go ahead with my previously planned rigorous exercise regime. It's about time I lost some weight and get in shape. Gotta keep up with the competition you know. Next, I'm finally gonna go finish up my driving lessons! That bloody annoying thing has stretched up and been put off for way too long. I need to quickly clear it and be done with it. In addition to my physical training, I think I ought to keep my mind in good shape as well. As soon as I can contact my friend, I shall get him to give me an introductory lesson on Java programming, to jump start the module I'll be taking next year. Gotta be ahead of the competition in this aspect. At the same time, I shall be signing up for several online courses, such as Photoshop and Japanese. Can't let my mind rot away again!

This is my strategy for progress.
Mind-Body-Soul
The 3 dimensional approach to perfection.

There is a reason I typed all this here. Is so I hold myself to it!! I'm not gonna let myself procrastinate away my future again! What's gotta be done, gotta be done.


Lastly, I would like to end off this Mega Post with one point which some might have missed. I've only mentioned 2 of the 3 dimensions in detail. I'm pretty sure you can make an intelligent guess what the other 1 is, by reading the front parts of this post. That is what I would really like to have. In order to attain the "Soul" aspect of my life. But only time will tell if it will happen for me.


Where does that leave my gaming addiction? Well, I realised there isn't much time left to fit that in eh? Well, I'll just have to slot it into the free slot left over. I'm training up my time management skills. Or I might just play lesser or not play at all. After all, the friend I was hoping would join me in gaming seems to be caught up in another game. All the more reason to quit eh? Well, we shall see.


So, I shall leave you with one question today.

What do you want to do with you life?